Written By Amy Beardsley
This essay is from a winner of the 2019 Student Loan Planner® Scholarship.
I pushed the enter button after the final question on the high-school career questionnaire. What would it tell me I should be when I grow up? I was excited and nervous; this computer was about to tell me what I should do for the rest of my life.
With a “97% match”, it said, “clown.”
I thought to myself, this has to be someone else’s test. Was there a way that another person’s results could show up on my computer?
I looked to my guidance counselor, whom I thought would laugh at the results with me. Instead, she gave me a list of seven clown schools in the area, as well as a contact list in case I had questions about my application.
I went through the rest of the day irate as my dad joked about fitting 17 of me in the car. My friends all bragged about careers such as nurse, engineer, or accountant. Those were 9-5 professional jobs – the jobs that I thought would be populated on my list.
My Search for a Satisfying Career
I left school that day not knowing what I would do with the rest of my life, but I knew that I wouldn't be a clown.
And so, I decided that I would not let that computer dictate my life. I went looking on my own for a career for someone who wanted to solve mysteries, to advocate for others, for a career for someone who wanted to work with people but was legitimately interested in science.
I was looking for a career that would satisfy the third grader in me who took her microscope to school and that is where I discovered speech language pathology.
At the time, I had no idea if I would even like speech pathology, but college applications were due soon and clown school was not on my agenda.
A Commitment to Student Loan Debt
Looking back, clown school would have been $13,000 total, where the six years required for an entry-level speech pathologist position set me back about $120,000. Four of those six years were done at a state school, where I accumulated half of my debt.
Since graduating with my master’s degree in 2017, I have only looked into becoming a sugar baby a handful of times, so I will call that a win. I have paid off about $20,000 of my loans so far and $40,000 of my husband’s mostly through the debt snowball method. By using the debt snowball method, the monthly amount we pay each month does not change, we are just more focused on how we allocate our funds.
As soon as one loan is paid off, we take what we were putting towards that loan (the minimum due as well as any consistent additional amount we were adding) and apply it towards the next loan, which is the loan with the lowest balance.
This method allows us to celebrate the small wins as we are paying off smaller loans, which allows us to stay motivated as we see the balances hit $0.
I wish I could say that it is easy, but it truly is not. It’s a serious commitment. It is saying “no” more times than we say “yes.” It’s driving past Starbucks every day without stopping when I was spending $2,500 a year there. It is budgeting “fun funds” so that we can still feel like life is fun, but so not fun that we remain in debt our entire lives.
I found that in order for us to be the most successful we can be, we do truly need to write out an actual budget and rely on using a cash-based system. That means that each week, we withdraw money from the bank in the amounts that are set out in our budget. When the cash for each category is done, we can’t swipe our debit cards to make up the difference, we have to simply wait for the following week when the cash system is replenished.
My advice to people graduating and starting to repay their loans is to start quickly and start aggressively. Even if you can only put $10 extra dollars a month towards your loan, do it.
People will always tell you that debt will be there, but you don’t have to be someone who perpetuates that thought. Student loan debt can be all-consuming but it doesn’t have to be a death sentence.
Be smart with your decisions, focus on the future you and your goals. It will seem like your friends are all going out every weekend but find happiness in not sabotaging your future self by blowing the first paycheck that you earned on $10 drinks.
What My Degree Allows Me to Do
There are days when I have a pity party and curse the day that language disorders were discovered, but every day I get the opportunity to work with elementary school students on the autism spectrum. Most of my scholars are minimally verbal who utilize behaviors as opposed to words to communicate.
When I wrap up my pity party, I take a step back to realize what this debt and degree have allowed me to do. I get to be the person who gives them a voice, whether it is vocalizations, low tech AAC devices like core boards, or high-tech devices that generate speech, similar to the one Stephen Hawking used.
I get to be the person who lets them know their words matter. The person who gives them a way to finally tell others that they hate milk despite being served it every day.
Even though I did not pursue a career as a clown, I often feel like I am a performer in a circus. Trying to find the balance of fun and engaging while remaining functional. Always thinking about where my students will be as adults and what I need to do to get them there.
My classroom is pure chaos, even on our best days and I wouldn't have it any other way. I have realized that even though a master’s in speech pathology is not a degree from clown school, it was the right degree for me, debt and all.
